Fellow Boomlandians,
Now that our old blogger has been called up to the big leagues, I will now be taking over the Boomland blog. I hope to be the blogger and more that Keenan was so here we go...
First of all, for those of you who do not know what Boomland is, you are seriously missing a part of your soul. Boomland means as much to this "B"-team as Renee Zellweger meant to Jerry Maguire; once you see it, your life will be completed (I just came back and read this terrible analogy. It's late, cut me some slack). That being said, all of you will have the opportunity to witness this historic landmark on our trip to to Mardi Gras in February.
This year, we have a lot of rookies on this team who have varying ranges of experience with the game of ultimate. Don't feel bad that you didn't make the A-team because you are still on a pretty damn good team. The goal for this team has always been to make it to regionals. We've never made it there, but last year we had this team's best showing at sectionals and almost made it there; I expect nothing less this year. We are in no way a "minor league" team. This team can compete with the better collegiate teams and we've shown that we can win against "A" teams. Think of us as the Chicago Cubs of ultimate; we get so close but we just can't get over that roadblock. Well there's always next year, and this is the year we make it to regionals.
That being said, we have a ton of work to do, and that is going to take commitment. I know everyone isn't in the greatest shape after eating pounds of Thanksgiving food over our break, but now is the time to start getting back into shape. I barely did anything over my Thanksgiving break, except for eat lots of turkey or the stereotypical peking duck (and yes some Asian people do eat duck for both Thanksgiving and Christmas), and still find myself working all that food off...I plan on working my ass as soon as I'm done with finals in 18hrs, booyakasha! Anyways, everyone needs to start building up some endurance and working on their "A-game" over break because we need to get right into the mix of things when we get back in January. The most important thing you should be working on, myself included, is...
1) Throws
2) Throws
3) Throws
Get outside and throw with someone. Throw by yourself. I don't care what you do, but we all need to get our throws down, because as of now, this team has very limited handlers. I think right now we have our Steve Nash in Steve Haake, both on the field and off the field, but Nash has it easy because he only has to play with 4 other people; Haake has 6 others around him so we need to take some of the load off of him and provide him with more handlers. Think of it this way, if you become a reliable handler, chances are you're going to get A LOT of playing time. I'll be periodically posting workouts and other things on here over winter break so everyone can get an idea of what you can do to stay in shape.
So I've spent far too long blogging and should probably get back to studying so...
Toodaloo,
K.Yee
Friday, December 11, 2009
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Monday, September 7, 2009
Use the Claw
Well friends, I feel the urge to come clean here. This may, in fact, be the last post of mine on the Boomland Blog. Shocking at the very least, I know. If we would have been a bit more on the ball about posting things there may have been another post but given our excessive time between post I don't really see another one happening.
So here's what I'm going to leave you with, some handy information that I've learned. Actually let's narrow that down to over the past week since I'm a fountain of knowledge.
1) Miley Cyrus will instantly turn a normal party into something more
2) It is never a good idea to mess with Mickey
3) It's illegal to layout on the quad
4) Putting off ME 350 homework is much easier with a blog to help use up the time (textsfromlastnight is also a good option)
And finally, in the words of the great Miles Corcoran at Lion Eyes last year, "I fucking love you guys." We were teammates all last year on Boomland together, if we're not all together again this year we're all teammates that are, or have been, part of Illinois Ultimate
Later doggys
Keenan
So here's what I'm going to leave you with, some handy information that I've learned. Actually let's narrow that down to over the past week since I'm a fountain of knowledge.
1) Miley Cyrus will instantly turn a normal party into something more
2) It is never a good idea to mess with Mickey
3) It's illegal to layout on the quad
4) Putting off ME 350 homework is much easier with a blog to help use up the time (textsfromlastnight is also a good option)
And finally, in the words of the great Miles Corcoran at Lion Eyes last year, "I fucking love you guys." We were teammates all last year on Boomland together, if we're not all together again this year we're all teammates that are, or have been, part of Illinois Ultimate
Later doggys
Keenan
Tuesday, July 28, 2009
Criss-Cross-Crash Bios
Alright assholes, here's the final bios
Joe Conerty - The token tall ginger of this team, Joe compliments his height with an insatiable hunger for burritos. Tackled the enormous burrito at some place in Baton Rouge. Debateably best rookie to have at a party that doesn't break stuff
Dana Caton - Dana was a stud swimmer in high school that decided Illinois was worth no scholarship. He's got some gnarly head fakes, on and off the field to boot. Next to Miley, one of the most likely to lose his shirt for the ladies, buzz word for that to happen has yet to be discovered
Jeff Gordon - Nascar has managed to perfect the art of the left turn cut he initiated last year. If he can find a way make it go right, and use the speed he showed in the combine he'll be a real NHRA hero
Aaron Yao - Uses his ability to wear a headband to full effect and perform the con of being a soccer player. One the Walden scale of honorability, he rates about a 7 with 1 being Mickey and a 10 for Walden
Rob Dreier - High school tennis super star, lost ability to smash 140 mph forehand in rubber match against Andy Roddick. Claims to be able to beat anyone on the team at Sesame Street Uno. These may or may not be truthful, but there's only so much I can do with the wrong-handed
Ryan 'Papa Bear' Kurnik - Rounds out car awesome for Mardi Gras managing to talk my voice hoarse during said trip. Second loudest on the team behind McLain, as a freshmen no less. Look to him to step up in the next 3 years and lead Fun Squad to new heights
Nik Patel - The heir apparent to the Indian title on the team. Nik isn't the loudest, maybe he's the quietest, leading to speculation on his non-Ultimate life. My goal for next year is to bring him out of his shell, and if not create a monster, then at least a force to be reckoned with
Steve Haake - Yet another Downers Grove product, honestly how many are there? Anyway, like Cozza, did gymnastics in high school but dont expect ill-advised completions just yet. Do expect a new heir-apparent to "GINGER SMASH" up and down the field, just as soon as he realizes he can run over skinny kids like me
Jacob Nelson - Arguably the most interesting running motion on the team, he appears physically in pain while in motion. Expect him to usurp the gangliest man on the team as soon as a graduate, a perfect replacement
Kevin 'Sprite' Cleary - Maybe the most party for the size. At 1 oompa-loompa in height, Sprite brings the thunder. He masqueraded as Chrysler's younger brother to work his charms on high schoolers. Is currently relearning how to play to the removal of his power source, Ernie the Hernia. RIP
Brandon Smith - I would call him mini-me, but that just isn't PC enough. So let's leave it at tall, awesome hair and pretty alright throws. Hasn't caught handleritis yet, but hopefully its inevitable onset won't be too significant
Jack Rabuck - The only person to submit an application to ride home with McKinley and I from Champaign after spring break. Possibly the funniest email I have ever seen. He excels at party games and uses his charisma to effectively 'Cheat to Win'
Charlie Ma - Although he doesn't show us, there are rumors aplenty he leads a pint sized Asian gang across campus that chalk complex transfer equations on the quad. Charlie also has bravery far beyond his size, he had his wisdom teeth taken out in Champaign instead of his native Boston, Mass.
Tim Pien - Another Boston native. Fun Fact - The Departed is his biography, Leonardo DiCaprio was forced to fill in for Jackie Chan to make it more 'Boston.' When not playing ultimate, Tim enjoys owning kids at Super Smash Bros. Watch out Troy
Adam Wright - Once spiked a dead disc at summer league. Once punched a hole in a wall after losing flip cup. Once enjoyed being hit on by cougars at Summerfest. Once ditched Mardi Gras for high school state wrestling. Many times threw scores. Knows numbers well enough to be a EE major
Kevin Bruns - Not much is known about this specimen outside ultimate. Might be Superman, its possible I suppose. More likely theory is that he was born to lead gingers to the promised land. Location yet to be decided, Atlantis at the top of the list
Joe Conerty - The token tall ginger of this team, Joe compliments his height with an insatiable hunger for burritos. Tackled the enormous burrito at some place in Baton Rouge. Debateably best rookie to have at a party that doesn't break stuff
Dana Caton - Dana was a stud swimmer in high school that decided Illinois was worth no scholarship. He's got some gnarly head fakes, on and off the field to boot. Next to Miley, one of the most likely to lose his shirt for the ladies, buzz word for that to happen has yet to be discovered
Jeff Gordon - Nascar has managed to perfect the art of the left turn cut he initiated last year. If he can find a way make it go right, and use the speed he showed in the combine he'll be a real NHRA hero
Aaron Yao - Uses his ability to wear a headband to full effect and perform the con of being a soccer player. One the Walden scale of honorability, he rates about a 7 with 1 being Mickey and a 10 for Walden
Rob Dreier - High school tennis super star, lost ability to smash 140 mph forehand in rubber match against Andy Roddick. Claims to be able to beat anyone on the team at Sesame Street Uno. These may or may not be truthful, but there's only so much I can do with the wrong-handed
Ryan 'Papa Bear' Kurnik - Rounds out car awesome for Mardi Gras managing to talk my voice hoarse during said trip. Second loudest on the team behind McLain, as a freshmen no less. Look to him to step up in the next 3 years and lead Fun Squad to new heights
Nik Patel - The heir apparent to the Indian title on the team. Nik isn't the loudest, maybe he's the quietest, leading to speculation on his non-Ultimate life. My goal for next year is to bring him out of his shell, and if not create a monster, then at least a force to be reckoned with
Steve Haake - Yet another Downers Grove product, honestly how many are there? Anyway, like Cozza, did gymnastics in high school but dont expect ill-advised completions just yet. Do expect a new heir-apparent to "GINGER SMASH" up and down the field, just as soon as he realizes he can run over skinny kids like me
Jacob Nelson - Arguably the most interesting running motion on the team, he appears physically in pain while in motion. Expect him to usurp the gangliest man on the team as soon as a graduate, a perfect replacement
Kevin 'Sprite' Cleary - Maybe the most party for the size. At 1 oompa-loompa in height, Sprite brings the thunder. He masqueraded as Chrysler's younger brother to work his charms on high schoolers. Is currently relearning how to play to the removal of his power source, Ernie the Hernia. RIP
Brandon Smith - I would call him mini-me, but that just isn't PC enough. So let's leave it at tall, awesome hair and pretty alright throws. Hasn't caught handleritis yet, but hopefully its inevitable onset won't be too significant
Jack Rabuck - The only person to submit an application to ride home with McKinley and I from Champaign after spring break. Possibly the funniest email I have ever seen. He excels at party games and uses his charisma to effectively 'Cheat to Win'
Charlie Ma - Although he doesn't show us, there are rumors aplenty he leads a pint sized Asian gang across campus that chalk complex transfer equations on the quad. Charlie also has bravery far beyond his size, he had his wisdom teeth taken out in Champaign instead of his native Boston, Mass.
Tim Pien - Another Boston native. Fun Fact - The Departed is his biography, Leonardo DiCaprio was forced to fill in for Jackie Chan to make it more 'Boston.' When not playing ultimate, Tim enjoys owning kids at Super Smash Bros. Watch out Troy
Adam Wright - Once spiked a dead disc at summer league. Once punched a hole in a wall after losing flip cup. Once enjoyed being hit on by cougars at Summerfest. Once ditched Mardi Gras for high school state wrestling. Many times threw scores. Knows numbers well enough to be a EE major
Kevin Bruns - Not much is known about this specimen outside ultimate. Might be Superman, its possible I suppose. More likely theory is that he was born to lead gingers to the promised land. Location yet to be decided, Atlantis at the top of the list
Thursday, July 2, 2009
Bios Part Last
| Andrew Schmid | #99 |
| Discovered: | 11/24/1986 |
| Title: | Schmoopy |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Carnivora |
| Family: | Mustelidae |
| Genus: | Mustela |
| Species: | M. mustela |
| Super subspcies: | A. Schmid M. mustela |
| Origin: | Created by his father's chemistry power and borne of his mother |
| Native to: | Downers Grove, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | Chicago |
| Height: | 1.4 Oompa Loompas |
| Speed: | Quick to Fast, dependent on shins |
| OBP: | .871, he is only one man |
| Most common stance: | Camped out in front of the box with no shirt |
| Communication: | Uses entertaining words such as per se and slumber, holds record for most texts in a one hour period |
| Fraternity Life: | negatory |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Dark, varies from hippie long to army short |
| Body Type: | Jacked |
| Strengths: | Knowledge of the game, attendance of logo night at murphy's every week, NBA jam |
| Weakness: | Poetry girl |
| Highlight: | Shutting down Hands at sectionals, determining the proper flowrate of a beverage dispenser |
| Lowlight: | Breaking said beverage dispenser |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Installation of hangboard in apartment, usage of monstrous amp at parties to "rock it" |
| Fun Fact: | Has the ability to create a nickname for someone within seconds of meeting them, has younger brother at Illinois who has been confused for him by past roommate |
| See also: | Ultimate, Downers Grove, Long boarding, Halo Halo Halo |
| Matt Novak | #82 |
| Discovered: | 3/25/1990 |
| Title: | |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Perissodactyla |
| Family: | Tapiridae |
| Genus: | Tapirus |
| Species: | Tapirus terrestris |
| Super subspcies: | M. Novak Tapirus terrestris |
| Origin: | A movie theater, why? I need something good |
| Native to: | Aurora, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | Naperville, who doesn’t if you're from Aurora? Just kidding homie |
| Height: | Tall-subTall |
| Speed: | Faster than slow |
| OBP: | .132, but is super adorable |
| Most common stance: | Confused, but then asking how to do better |
| Communication: | Rare, leads to shy appearance |
| Fraternity Life: | no |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Brown, minimal |
| Body Type: | Strength hidden behind baggy clothes |
| Strengths: | Intensity on the field, hilarious comments off |
| Weakness: | Looking goofy |
| Highlight: | Monster layout D against Western Michigan at Huck Hinn 09 |
| Lowlight: | Poor showing at first Road House event |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Taunting McKinley on the first night of spring break with the two headed girl |
| Fun Fact: | May have a man crush on Andy, has him quoted on his facebook |
| See also: | Ultimate, Cubs, youtube, future sophomores of tomorrow |
| Jon Ogrodnik | #80 |
| Discovered: | 8/20/1987 |
| Title: | Facial Hair God |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Carnivora |
| Family: | Mustelidae |
| Genus: | Gulo |
| Species: | G. gulo |
| Super subspcies: | J. Ogrodnik G. gulo |
| Origin: | Chuck Norris' beard |
| Native to: | Wheeling, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | A land without the ability to grow facial hair and be their god |
| Height: | Medium |
| Speed: | Not real fast, but not real slow |
| OBP: | 0.198 |
| Most common stance: | Looking intimidating, stroking mustache |
| Communication: | Twitches mustache in elaborate communicating system, if that is ineffective uses words |
| Fraternity Life: | No |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Dark brown,close cropped |
| Body Type: | Unimportant, look at the beard |
| Strengths: | Backhand, ability to create spectacular custumes for theme parties |
| Weakness: | Need to shave every hour in order to tame the beast |
| Highlight: | Playing out of his mind D, several occasions (Ball State foremost) |
| Lowlight: | 21st Birthday at Brothers, as in second Highlight *highfive* |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Ability to grow more facial hair in a week than all the freshmen combined |
| Fun Fact: | Has an extensive musical collection with an emphasis on new age and classic rock |
| See also: | Ultimate, Schick Quattro, The most interesting man alive |
| Dave 'Splash' Janociak | #77 |
| Discovered: | 6/23/1989 |
| Title: | Mr. Splashtastic |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Cetacea |
| Family: | Delphinidae |
| Genus: | Tursiops |
| Species: | Tursiops truncatus |
| Super subspcies: | D. Janociak Tursiops truncatus |
| Origin: | The deep blue |
| Native to: | Lemont,IL |
| Wishes he were from: | Sea World |
| Height: | Medium-Tall |
| Speed: | Faster than you would think, for a land creature |
| OBP: | High, rumored at least .845 |
| Most common stance: | Swimming through puddles after layout practice |
| Communication: | Laughter, if that fails echolocation |
| Fraternity Life: | No, but then yes |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Light brown, akin to a bowlcut |
| Body Type: | Normal, until you see his dorsal fin |
| Strengths: | Breathes water, will layout for a disc anywhere within 15 ft of person |
| Weakness: | Dry skin, crossfield hammers |
| Highlight: | Puddle jumping Mardi Gras 08 |
| Lowlight: | Discovering that bad plays result in diminishing nickname (Splash > Splish > Drip > Sandy) |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Once lashed two sea turtles together with his own hair to create a raft in order to exact his revenge on Captain Barbossa |
| Fun Fact: | Recruited Andy and Brandon to play ultimate at Illinois, how he managed is up for debate. Scooby snacks viable option |
| See also: | Ultimate, Flipper, Ping Pong, Synchronized Swimming |
| Spenser Murakami | #66 |
| Discovered: | 12/23/1987 |
| Title: | Style Patrol |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Carnivora |
| Family: | Eupleridae |
| Genus: | Fossa |
| Species: | Fossa fossana |
| Super subspcies: | S. Murakami Fossa fossana |
| Origin: | Hatched from the egg of an eagle, nursed to health by a wolf, and taught numbers by Einstein |
| Native to: | Naperville, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | A more normal origin |
| Height: | Medium |
| Speed: | Fast |
| OBP: | 1.000 |
| Most common stance: | Attempting one handed grabs with unnecessary jumps |
| Communication: | Uses hip glasses to lure people into conversations, then astounds with smartness |
| Fraternity Life: | no |
| Natural hair color/shape: | black, short |
| Body Type: | Ironman |
| Strengths: | Speed, style off the field |
| Weakness: | Minimal, sources close to the subject say dirt under fingernails |
| Highlight: | Roasting Chicago at sectionals for multiple scores |
| Lowlight: | Point against Texas at Mardi Gras 09, the point that would not end |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Repping Naperville likes its going out of style |
| Fun Fact: | Has introduced girlfriend on a bus, but has not been to a party (to my knowledge), smart play sir |
| See also: | Naperville, Ultimate, Speedness, quickeration |
It's been another fun ride gents, I'll be seeing all y'all when we get back in August. Until then,
Unglockables,
Keenan
Wednesday, July 1, 2009
BIos Part 3
| Shane Randa | #57 |
| Discovered: | 6/9/1989 |
| Title: | Shabbbby |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Amphibia |
| Order: | Caudata |
| Family: | Ambystomatidae |
| Genus: | Ambystoma |
| Species: | A. mexicanum |
| Super subspcies: | S. Randa A. mexicanum |
| Origin: | The land of clap catches |
| Native to: | Oswego, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | South Park, CO |
| Height: | Medium-Rare |
| Speed: | Quick, but not too quick |
| OBP: | .359, uses full powers rarely |
| Most common stance: | Looking adorable, before making knee breaking cut, then adorable again |
| Communication: | Will disagree with you out of spite, then not apologize. Hurtful |
| Fraternity Life: | No |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Dark Brown |
| Body Type: | Strongly Strong, hidden beneath strongness |
| Strengths: | Strength, teaching math ability, fakes |
| Weakness: | Story telling ability (lie if you arent exciting, none of us are) |
| Highlight: | Any layout, more importantly the recovery after an ugly one |
| Lowlight: | The aforementioned layout upon impact |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | His ability to astound with knowledge one minute then tell a dirty joke the next |
| Fun Fact: | Once fit 18 dwarfs into his truck bed in order to prove that you can bring 2 baseball teams in one car |
| See also: | Ultimate, Oswego, Child Stars, Mathematic educators ate Tomorrow (MEAT) |
| Kevin Yee | #55 |
| Discovered: | 10/6/1987 |
| Title: | Jelly Master |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Carnivora |
| Family: | Ailuridae |
| Genus: | Ailurus |
| Species: | A. fulgens |
| Super subspcies: | K. Yee A. fulgens |
| Origin: | A tube in the unmentionables section |
| Native to: | Palatine, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | Chicago for Da Bulls |
| Height: | Medium |
| Speed: | A quick asian!!! Brilliant |
| OBP: | 0.198 |
| Most common stance: | Discussing the validity of Chicago sports trades and player's stats |
| Communication: | High level sports, medium level normalcy, low level nerd-dom |
| Fraternity Life: | no |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Black, buzzedish |
| Body Type: | Stringy |
| Strengths: | Sick cuts, dropping stats, dropping rhymes |
| Weakness: | Nicknames |
| Highlight: | Knocking around bizarro Yee on Wisconsin B, using rarely seen talent of heckles that leave subject in tears |
| Lowlight: | Huck Finn 07, we'll call it the K Shah incident |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Ability to keep up with 3 TVs at once at the 31 |
| Fun Fact: | Has uncanny ability to run tables for hours on end, enter at your own risk |
| See also: | Chicago Bulls, Cubs, Ultimate, Three Legged Races |
| Kai Kosog | #51 |
| Discovered: | 8/29/1990 |
| Title: | The woodsman |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Carnivora |
| Family: | Canidae |
| Genus: | Canis |
| Species: | Canis Lupus |
| Super subspcies: | K. Kosog Canis Lupus |
| Origin: | Raised by wolves |
| Native to: | Geneva, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | Montana |
| Height: | Medium-Well |
| Speed: | Quick, added by layouts |
| OBP: | 0.576 |
| Most common stance: | Flying through the air for a D |
| Communication: | Bilingual, knows both English and language of the wild |
| Fraternity Life: | No, one man wolfpack |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Blonde, medium |
| Body Type: | Gymnast |
| Strengths: | Being strong, no regard for own health, ability to seduce anyone |
| Weakness: | Foot fetishes (only speculated, maybe) |
| Highlight: | Crushing Belmont with layouts at Music City |
| Lowlight: | Losing a wrestling match with a bear |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Is the cousin of the boyfriend of a cousin of mine. Wowzers |
| Fun Fact: | Can tame and ride a wild boar within 24 hours |
| See also: | Ultimate, gymnastics, lifeguarding, woodsmanizing |
| Joe Kirchberg | #41 |
| Discovered: | 2/20/1988 |
| Title: | Crazy Indiana Transfer Guy |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Repitilia |
| Order: | Squamata |
| Family: | Viperidae |
| Genus: | Crotalus |
| Species: | Crotalus basiliscus |
| Super subspcies: | J. Kirchberg Crotalus basiliscus |
| Origin: | East of Illinois in the state that shall not be named |
| Native to: | His facebook doesn’t say, lame |
| Wishes he were from: | Atlantis |
| Height: | Shortish |
| Speed: | Quickish |
| OBP: | Highish |
| Most common stance: | Laughing, then the quality stare down |
| Communication: | Uses clever words and phrases to confuse the weak minded, like a jedi |
| Fraternity Life: | Not at Illinois |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Dark, short |
| Body Type: | Strong through powers unimagined |
| Strengths: | Being underestimated then crushing, ability to eat massive amounts, spidey-sense |
| Weakness: | Knees |
| Highlight: | Being the best junior rookie of all year |
| Lowlight: | Still having to be a rookie even though he was older than the other rookies (Vets looked upon his situation favorably, most of the time) |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Ability to thwart my attempts to create a good bio by having little information available |
| Fun Fact: | Woke up at 5am and skipped class to make it to Mardi Gras first because it was also his birthday |
| See also: | Ultimate, Illinois > Indiana, Unconvential sporting events |
| Peter Lutz | #39 |
| Discovered: | 7/19/1988 |
| Title: | Private Ultimate |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Vertebrata |
| Order: | Carnivora |
| Family: | Felidae |
| Genus: | Panthera |
| Species: | Pardus |
| Super subspcies: | P. Lutz Pardus |
| Origin: | Born of the cosmic waste to bring harmony to the earth |
| Native to: | Glenview, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | Imaginationland |
| Height: | Tall guy |
| Speed: | Keenan-esque |
| OBP: | .390 |
| Most common stance: | Jumping over someone |
| Communication: | Useful combination of words and utilization of ROTC powers if that doesn’t work |
| Fraternity Life: | yes |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Brown, army cut |
| Body Type: | Robocop |
| Strengths: | Being tall, being intimidating, grows stronger the more heckled |
| Weakness: | Kryptonite |
| Highlight: | Callahan against Kansas at Mardi Gras 09 |
| Lowlight: | Arriving late to sectionals, but awesome once there |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Ability to protect me from the crazy people out in the world with supreme ninja powers |
| Fun Fact: | Can swim in water with full combat loading. Speculation remains on whether will still work in pudding |
| See also: | ROTC, ultimate, water balloon artillery |
Tuesday, June 30, 2009
Bios Part 2
| Brian 'Pappy Jr' Pierce | #36 |
| Discovered: | 10/10/1989 |
| Title: | |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Aves |
| Order: | Sphenisciformes |
| Family: | Spheniscidae |
| Genus: | Eudyptes |
| Species: | E. pachyrhynchus |
| Super subspcies: | B. Pierce E. pachyrhynchus |
| Origin: | A pheonix from the ashes of pappy sr. |
| Native to: | Mt. Prospect, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | The moon, just because |
| Height: | Tall |
| Speed: | Quick for a tall guy |
| OBP: | unknown |
| Most common stance: | Throwing head fakes |
| Communication: | uses freshmen innocence to confound others, then strikes with full force |
| Fraternity Life: | no |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Brown, short |
| Body Type: | Gangly |
| Strengths: | Being lefthanded, tree removal |
| Weakness: | Ability to heckle effectively |
| Highlight: | Driving the mardi gras car through the chase of mississippi to find those girls |
| Lowlight: | Lack of attendance at parties, must show more fun squad potential in the future |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Will share / listen to stories on long car ride. Drives the getaway car like a champ |
| Fun Fact: | Tried to be unnamed pappy jr, but was unable due to brian as first name |
| See also: | wrong handedness, ultimate |
| Chris 'Pecs' Kvistad | #32 |
| Discovered: | 1/25/1990 |
| Title: | |
| Scientific Classification: | Conan |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Actinopterygii |
| Order: | Scorpaeniformes |
| Family: | Psychrolutidae |
| Genus: | Psychrolutes |
| Species: | P. phrictus |
| Super subspcies: | C. Kvistad P. phrictus |
| Origin: | Burst forth from a tub of protein powder |
| Native to: | Schaumburg, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | Venice, CA |
| Height: | Height is unimportant with pipes like his |
| Speed: | You better hope your faster then him because its game over if he catches you |
| OBP: | 0.823 |
| Most common stance: | Flexing |
| Communication: | Uses a mixture of intimidation for males and strutting to attract females. Highly effective |
| Fraternity Life: | Yes, Fiji |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Dark, short |
| Body Type: | Muscley, see nickname for more |
| Strengths: | Strength, fakes, style points |
| Weakness: | Pickle jars, thumbers |
| Highlight: | Creating a dominate force in medinah ultimate, finding the handler groove |
| Lowlight: | Deciding drumline is cooler than ultimate |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | The debatably inappropriately tight shirts |
| Fun Fact: | When in doubt of location, a quick trip to the gym will yield Chris's location |
| See also: | Mr. Universe, ultimate, three legged races, conant high |
| Matt Kurley | #29 |
| Discovered: | 12/9/1987 |
| Title: | "That's not my name" Kurley |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Vertebrata |
| Order: | Mammalia |
| Family: | Bovidae |
| Genus: | Saiga |
| Species: | Saiga tatarica |
| Super subspcies: | M. Kurley Saiga tatarica |
| Origin: | The land of lost names |
| Native to: | Champaign, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | Anywere that wouldn’t denote him as a townie |
| Height: | Average |
| Speed: | Fast, perfect for deep cuts |
| OBP: | 1.000, although rarely seen |
| Most common stance: | Looking angry |
| Communication: | yelling at someone for doing something wrong or teaching the finer points of semi-conductors |
| Fraternity Life: | no |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Dark blonde, short for a long haircut |
| Body Type: | High school superstar cross country runner |
| Strengths: | Cuts, button down shirts |
| Weakness: | In cuts, but they have now gotten to the point where it's harder to heckle |
| Highlight: | Shutting down kool-aid, joining the ranks of Boomland |
| Lowlight: | First attempt at a disc freshmen year |
| Keenan's Favorite thing: | The exchange with the girls next door |
| Fun Fact: | Has a dad who's a plastic surgeon and has radio ads. Ballin' in a word |
| See also: | Cross country, profanity, ultimate, competitive egg toss |
| Mark Hirschman | #25 |
| Discovered: | 2/7/1989 |
| Title: | Marky Mark |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Carnivora |
| Family: | Canidae |
| Genus: | Canis |
| Species: | Canis Lupus |
| Super subspcies: | M. Hirschman Canis Lupus |
| Origin: | Naperville, IL |
| Native to: | Kansas |
| Wishes he were from: | Naperville, IL. It’s a surprise anyone lives in Kansas |
| Height: | Unimportant, will jump over you |
| Speed: | N/A, torn ACL |
| OBP: | .200, but only because he doesn’t normally try |
| Most common stance: | Pacing sidelines looking angry |
| Communication: | Refuses to be wrong, typically is correct |
| Fraternity Life: | No |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Brown |
| Body Type: | Champ, since injury has turned upper body into a Greek God's |
| Strengths: | Always going to tourneys, coaching points, balancing Mickey |
| Weakness: | Knee, or remains of |
| Highlight: | Pregame speech against Kansas at Mardi Gras 08 |
| Lowlight: | The day that shall not be named |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Ability to instantly charm females with his eyes, and if that fails the washboard |
| Fun Fact: | Once trained a tornado to save him from Kansas and spirited him to Champaign to get to school |
| See also: | Ultimate, Knee rehab, Kansas, Ares, awesome |
| Brian Chrysler | #22 |
| Discovered: | 2/6/1988 |
| Title: | First team MVP to miss the most practice of all time |
| Scientific Classification: | |
| Kingdom: | Animalia |
| Phylum: | Chordata |
| Class: | Mammalia |
| Order: | Diprotodontia |
| Family: | Macropodidae |
| Genus: | Dendrolagus |
| Species: | Dendrolagus goodfellowi |
| Super subspcies: | B. Chrysler Dendrolagus goodfellowi |
| Origin: | Born from all the sleeves that have been torn off shirts |
| Native to: | Vernon Hills, IL |
| Wishes he were from: | A farm in order to take care of all the animals |
| Height: | Medium, but extra bouncey |
| Speed: | Fast |
| OBP: | 1.000 |
| Most common stance: | Catching scores, laying out |
| Communication: | Extensive communication skills with males and females, will use to advantage at every chance |
| Fraternity Life: | no |
| Natural hair color/shape: | Hair unknown, speculated to be brown but is typically covered by a hat |
| Body Type: | Manly, but not quite Miles-esque |
| Strengths: | Socks, layouts, knowledge of disney characters |
| Weakness: | His archenemy, Sergei. Expect an earth shattering battle in the next 3 years |
| Highlight: | Winning at botecelli by using Reggie Rocket from Rocket Power |
| Lowlight: | Lossing all his piggies to a mystery disease |
| Keenan's Favorite Thing: | Disney sing-a-longs |
| Fun Fact: | Chrysler hates not having fun, can on command think of better pick up lines than Mickey. See Tennessee for more info |
| See also: | Ultimate, veterinary, cubs, sleeveless wonders |
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